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The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Crono on Fri Jul 16th at 4:50am 2004

run out of the over used plot device thinking, "I'm fine now ... so everything will be okay ... and hey at least I got to shoot a Nazi in the face" ... I slowly stopped from my running pace ... and vomited all over the sidewalk from the sight of his eye swinging on the nerve out the back of his skull. Continuing on, I ran and ran. I slowly realized that I had no f**king clue where I was ... I didn't even remember how I got into that house, the only thing I remembered before that was unbearable to think of it was ... [addsig]



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Hugh on Fri Jul 16th at 4:54am 2004

stealing a pie from my mother's house. The shame still burns a hole inside my heart. It's the savagery of the human spirit, I told myself, but the shame burned stronger and stronger until suddenly



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by G.Ballblue on Fri Jul 16th at 5:08am 2004

A strange man with a wonky hair doo and funky sun glasses blazed through the door on his heels.

"Hey slik." He said. He must have been refering to himself, since his mouth was bent in this position --->

[addsig]



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Tracer Bullet on Fri Jul 16th at 5:59am 2004

I didn't like the look of the character, so I smashed his teeth out with the but of my trusty Sturmgewar, riped is pants down, and stuffed one of my grenades up is ass. He sounded as though he was enjoying that a bit too much, so I pulled the pin and ran for cover...



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Crono on Fri Jul 16th at 6:24am 2004

Little did I know at the time that the grenades I picked up from the future didn't explode, instead they imploded, such that the area was easier to pillage afterwards ... the man collapsed in on himself into nothingness. The only thing that was left was the pin on the ground I picked it up and oddly enough it was the molecular ant ... "holy s**t!" I exclaimed ... [addsig]



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by $loth on Fri Jul 16th at 10:59am 2004

The ant pointed behind me, there were people running down the street towards me, all of them were wearing pink shell suits with black oversized helmets with the word 'Polizei' inprinted onto it, apart from the one at the front, who obviously was the leader. I thought this was it, i was going to be chucked into a dingy german cell for the rest of my life, with a middle aged crack addict called bubba who would make me his bitch. No! i thought, i would make a run for it, here and now. There was a tram behind the police, overtaking them, i still had my pistol, i could overpower the driver and get away. [addsig]



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Hugh on Fri Jul 16th at 11:57am 2004

But then I realized... guns aren't the answer... love and acceptance is! So I ran towards the police officer and gave him a biiiiiiiiiiiiig hug! And flowers rained down from the sky! YAY everyone shouted with glee! Until the toxic fumes came and killed them all. Being the eternal opportunist that I am, I stole all their wallets and ran to the grocery store only to find that the clerk was dead, so I had no need for my money! But I DID have need for all the



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by $loth on Fri Jul 16th at 1:18pm 2004

Tooth picks on aisle 12, I knew that with the police after me i would have to make a shelter on the outskirts of the town. I could sharpen them with the pen knife I picked up in the aisle near the wood and power tools. [addsig]



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Tracer Bullet on Fri Jul 16th at 3:52pm 2004

However, before I left, I grabbed a large quantity of bleach and potassium chlorid salt substitute, along with twenty pounds of suger...

When I reached the outskirts and had properly built my tooth pic shelter, I made some potassium perchlorate from the materials I had brought with me, and mixed it throughly with the suger.

Having obtained this very powerfull explosive, all I needed was a target. "I hope I meet a nazi" I thought...





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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by ReNo on Fri Jul 16th at 4:01pm 2004

, which was rather apt, given the Nazi convention being held in the next field.
[addsig]



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by matt on Fri Jul 16th at 5:25pm 2004

So, creeping up slowly on all fours, the nazi convension slowly dawned below me. But wait, someone else is creeping up on the convension behind me, its...



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Kage_Prototype on Fri Jul 16th at 5:52pm 2004

James Brown! The king of soul had an urgent message to deliver... [addsig]



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Crono on Fri Jul 16th at 6:16pm 2004

Right after I noticed he was there I fell unconscious. When I awoke, I could feel nothing but bright lights and hear nothing but ... James Brown ...

I opened my eyes to see that the entire Nazi threat was being led by the king of soul. My head was pounding to, "SAY IT LOUD!! I'M ARIAN AND I'M PROUD, SAY IT LOUD..." from the wife beater himself.

I slowly stood up, the entire crowd diverted their attention to me, they all had such hatred in them. "What happened", I thought, taking that none of this existed when I originally left this time ... right about now, actually.

Mr. Brown exclaimed, .... [addsig]



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Tracer Bullet on Fri Jul 16th at 6:40pm 2004

"That man has a large quantity of home-improvised explosives!" His voice was theatrical, and filled with affected outrage "Tear his heart out and bring it to me before he kills us all!".

Fortunately, I still had the molecular ant...





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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by G.Ballblue on Fri Jul 16th at 7:33pm 2004

The ant re-drew his molecular cell structure, and duplicated himself into thousands of other molecular cell-rearraning ants. Since there were about 400 molecular ants floating aimlessly in the air, with nothing better to do, and faced with the fact that I had a whole Wolfenstein Nazi Squad out to kill me, I told the ants to [addsig]



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Biological Component on Fri Jul 16th at 7:42pm 2004

bite them repeatedly until [addsig]



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Tracer Bullet on Fri Jul 16th at 7:54pm 2004

Stricken for disgusting content

[addsig]



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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Tracer Bullet on Sat Jul 17th at 12:38am 2004

Okay so that last seems to have killed things. eating human bone marrow can do that to a story...

Trying again:

I told the ants to bite repeatedly until...

...the Nazis were so red and irritated theat they were incapacitated by the overpowering need to scratch...





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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by SumhObo on Sat Jul 17th at 1:10am 2004

The level of frustration in the area skyrocketed.
.
"NO! We cannot be defeated by a mere pack of ANTS!" Brown screamed. He grabbed his ever-ready blowtorch and flamed two of his fellow Nazis until all the ants were dead... but not the Nazis. "Capture him and place him in a dark room with nothing but a swinging light and a wooden door!"




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 Re: The Story, A Dramatic Tale in Hundreds of Parts
Posted by Kage_Prototype on Sat Jul 17th at 1:12am 2004

That is, until Hulk Hogan suddenly appeared (theme music and all), and... [addsig]




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