How to have a kick-ass christmas.
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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by LAzerMANiac on Sun Dec 5th at 4:46am 2004


1. The whole nativity thing is getting old. How about we have FATALITY scenes set up on our front lawns instead? Mortal Kombat fans will truly appreciate that.

2. Aren't you tired of listening to those boring christams tunes year after year after year? Bring out the techno!!! I personally advise this track...

3. Christmas trees are a well-kept tradition and should never be changed. In fact, it should be honorary to have more christmas trees than your neighbor. See who in your neighborhood has the biggest tree, most trees or some other feat like that. Drop in with your buddies and some snacks and have a good time.

4. If it snows where you live, build forts and start a multi-day all-neighborhood snowball version of Desert Storm. If it doesn't snow where you live, but it is too cold to use water guns, go out and play paintball.

5. There is no christmas like a flashy christmas. Try and entangle your house and the nearby land with as much lights as your power box can handle, and then some.

6. Blow s**t up!!! This especially goes if you live in a state where fireworks are allowed. If you don't, then burn things. Let your inner pyro loose, warm your soul and your body with a little bit of Christmas-strength homemade Napalm!

7. Invite friends over and play video games. If you don't happen to have video games, you are probably an Anime nerd. Watch tons upon tons of Ruroni Kenshin and Naruto, I reccomend it. So, you're not an anime nerd, either? I guess you are a Normal Kid [shudder] In that case, either GET some video games and/or Anime, or make sure to get invited by an Anime Nerd or Video Games Freak.

8. If you belong to any forums, look at people's avatars. Save every single one with a Santa Hat attached that is not there normally. Start a new thread and show off how many different ones you found. Perhaps, be a bit more creative and start a web album of them.

9. Get drunk. If you can't or don't want to get drunk, get hyper off of coffe or sugar. Don't sleep.

10. Have weird contests with your friends, like "Who can piss a prettier pattern in the snow" or "Just how far can you lodge a spoon down your throat". Remember now, play it safe...

11. Gifts are fun. Thus show off every single thing you get, even if they are minimal. Try and attack as many of them to your person and walk around like that. People will love your new designer thong and 1:60 USS Midway model...

12. Party aftermath tip: Make sure your fellow partyers are capable of taking themselves outside before they puke, not after.

13. If you're a stupid f**k, sleep through the whole ordeal.

14. Go around the neighborhood singing "jingle bells, batman smells" at the top of your lungs, to the abovementioned techno beat until physically restrained.

15. Make clothing out of gift wrappers. Go out. See if people notice.

16. Create grotesque sexual displays involving snowmen, sonwwomen, snow-tentacle monsters and so on and so forth. Extra points if you create them on the fromt porches of your neighbors.

17. Pretend you forgot what date it is and go trick-or-treating.

18. If it snows in your area, host an all-neighborhood snowblower race. If it doesn't snow in your area, host an all-neighborhood lawnmower race.

19. if your area is boring, like, say Wyoming or Iowa, find friends who don't live in a boring area. Organise a road trip. Repeat aove steps as needed.

20. Make it up to someone you hurt before but never got to making up.

I was bored. Some of these ideas are more serious. I hope this evolves into another "long story in hundreds of parts" What can YOU add?

[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by $loth on Sun Dec 5th at 7:19am 2004


Anyone got one of those really annoying ties which play that god awful tune when you press a button and light up? [addsig]



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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by Cassius on Sun Dec 5th at 7:29am 2004


Its hard to imagine that I made Fool's Paradise last Christmas.



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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by Hugh on Sun Dec 5th at 8:16am 2004


I've got a Santa hat that has a motion detector, the hat will wave back at you [addsig]



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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by pepper on Sun Dec 5th at 8:27am 2004


[q] 4. If it snows where you live, build forts and start a multi-day all-neighborhood snowball version of Desert Storm. If it doesn't snow where you live, but it is too cold to use water guns, go out and play paintball.[/q]

i actualy did that, we fortificated the whole parking lot for a day, we scavaged the neighbourhood in the search of snow. not everyone was happy wiht that.
[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by $loth on Sun Dec 5th at 9:21am 2004


? quoting pepper
we scavaged the neighbourhood in the search of snow

But your little firey snark burned it all!

[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by pepper on Sun Dec 5th at 10:13am 2004


no, he wasnt there, he was in his cage!. although after a while i decided to take him out and throw him to the opposition troops, they dindt really like as they ran away half-burning. noone has ever seen them anymore since then.
[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by OtZman on Sun Dec 5th at 11:35am 2004


? quote:

7. Invite friends over and play video games. If you don't happen to have video games, you are probably an Anime nerd. Watch tons upon tons of Ruroni Kenshin and Naruto, I reccomend it. So, you're not an anime nerd, either? I guess you are a Normal Kid [shudder] In that case, either GET some video games and/or Anime, or make sure to get invited by an Anime Nerd or Video Games Freak.


Something to add to this one: Get a DDR dance pad and some kind of DDR game to your X-box, PS2 or you computer.
[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by satchmo on Sun Dec 5th at 11:12pm 2004


Close the curtains, turn on the gas fireplace, and strip naked with my girlfriend in bed and snuggle all day. How can you beat that?

It's even better than mapping!
[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by diablobasher on Sun Dec 5th at 11:27pm 2004


Sadly, this time of year im too busy hiding in fear of the singing mini chreistmas tree, it sings jingle bell rocks and has BIG EYES 0_o

we also have a dancing singing dog, and a singing ST bernad, its scary.

Lol fatality scene, thatl kill, i mean scare away pesky carol singers.

*start thinking about how he can attach a guilotine to his doorbell, hmm, maybe his porch needs to be a func hurt, its simple, but effective. so many different ways....*

[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by Spartan on Sun Dec 5th at 11:37pm 2004


This christmas I'm going down to all the local elementary schools and putting on puppet show for the kids about how santa claus isn't real and the commies are taking their parents away. [addsig]



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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by Neural Scan on Sun Dec 5th at 11:39pm 2004


I will open some presents, stuff my face with chocolate/christmas dinner then play hl2

Oh, I need to get out more...





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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by Spartan on Sun Dec 5th at 11:42pm 2004


? quoting Neural Scan
Oh, I need to get out more...

Don't worry I'm on it already. I've already sent a pair of weight loss rotties to your house to chase your chubby ass down and make you lose those pounds.

[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by Orpheus on Sun Dec 5th at 11:53pm 2004


as i said before, giving is better than getting now that i am older.

also, since a certain kind of reality sets in upon you as age creeps up you begin to wonder, exactly how many more Christmas's you will see, or worse, how many till a loved one is not around to see it with.

when i was in my 20's (about an average age for the snarkpit to understand from) i never gave any thought to my mortality, or anyones for that matter.. dead was a long ways away, none of my teenage friends had died in car crashes or drug overdoses, so death was relatively an unknown factor in my life.

as i grew older, i began to realize that i am 1/2 way to dead now, assuming i live only twice my age (which statistically i will NOT do).

i like to just hang out with my kin on holidays, and enjoy the ones whom are still here, but my real joy is the children. it doesn't matter that they are not mine, or only related through marriage. the kids are where its at guys.. someday you may believe that.. at least i hope you live long enough to believe.

if you guys knew how hard it is for me to rebuild all these PC's you'd understand the joy's of giving one to some kid. even if they end up smashing it, it still feels good.

/ 2 cents

[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by Gwil on Sun Dec 5th at 11:55pm 2004


Go to church and give thanks to God for giving us Jesus, and to Jesus as he died for our sins.

What? You wanted to know how to celebrate Christmas, perhaps people should go celebrate Christmas, not consumermas


[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by Neural Scan on Sun Dec 5th at 11:57pm 2004


? quoting Spartan 34
? quoting Neural Scan
Oh, I need to get out more...

Don't worry I'm on it already. I've already sent a pair of weight loss rotties to your house to chase your chubby ass down and make you lose those pounds.

I'm so skinny I would die. PLEASE! Don't do that!

[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by Spartan on Mon Dec 6th at 12:16am 2004


? quoting Gwil
Go to church and give thanks to God for giving us Jesus, and to Jesus as he died for our sins.

What? You wanted to know how to celebrate Christmas, perhaps people should go celebrate Christmas, not consumermas


Yes yes thank you. Finally Someone has said it. Orph also gave a great point too. I have come to hate christmas nowadays because everyone else is out looking for the newest most expensive thing they can buy and don't even give a s**t about the actual meaning of it. Also nothing is very friendly in my house around christmas.

P.S. Virgin mobiles commercials have pretty much raped the holiday.

[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by LAzerMANiac on Mon Dec 6th at 7:27am 2004


? quote:
Close the curtains, turn on the gas fireplace, and strip naked with my girlfriend in bed and snuggle all day. How can you beat that?

It's even better than mapping!


I'm only 16, so i wouldn't know from personal experience, but it sure sounds as fun I'm taking my girlfriend out to a fancy dinner, to go with step #20. Other than that, I'm probably going to work on a zombie map pack

keep the ideas coming, people...
/me wants to see what lep would add...
[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by OtZman on Mon Dec 6th at 3:45pm 2004


? quote:

? quote:
Close the curtains, turn on the gas fireplace, and strip naked with my girlfriend in bed and snuggle all day. How can you beat that?

It's even better than mapping!


I'm only 16, so i wouldn't know from personal experience, but it sure sounds as fun I'm taking my girlfriend out to a fancy dinner, to go with step #20. Other than that, I'm probably going to work on a zombie map pack

keep the ideas coming, people...
/me wants to see what lep would add...


Over here you have to be over 15... my problem is that I don't have or have ever had, a girlfriend. Guess I'll have to stick with something more trusty as my computer or my PS2... or perhaps my calculator. People aren't to be trusted !!
[addsig]




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Re: How to have a kick-ass christmas.
Posted by Leperous on Mon Dec 6th at 4:05pm 2004


? quoting Spartan 34
? quoting Gwil
Go to church and give thanks to God for giving us Jesus, and to Jesus as he died for our sins.

What? You wanted to know how to celebrate Christmas, perhaps people should go celebrate Christmas, not consumermas

Yes yes thank you. Finally Someone has said it. Orph also gave a great point too. I have come to hate christmas nowadays because everyone else is out looking for the newest most expensive thing they can buy and don't even give a s**t about the actual meaning of it. Also nothing is very friendly in my house around christmas.

Some people (*cough*) don't celebrate Christmas for the Christian message. Besides, it was originally a pagan (I think?) ritual way before Christianity ever existed before some Roman emperor/pope nicked it...






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