The pleasure of my own company
Post Reply
Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by satchmo on Fri Mar 18th at 4:47pm 2005


I saw an interesting patient last night. The young parents were visibly frazzled by the time they're at the urgent care. They were convinced that their son has some sort of strange seizure or neurological problem. But they were also worrying about leukemia, schizophrenia, and all kinds of random serious illnesses (at least they did not mention ebola).

Anyway, they told me that recently they frequently find their two-year-old son alone on the sofa, twitching and sweating with his face all flushed. They said that this could go on for many minutes, and then he'd go to sleep after these episodes.

I realized what was going on right away, but I wanted to tell them gradually. If I just informed them straight away, they would probably think I'm crazy. So I spent the first couple of minutes reassuring them that I don't believe their son has seizure of any serious conditions. In fact, I see this quite often and what he was doing is completely harmless and normal.

The two-year-old just discovered his genital and the secret to self-pleasuring. Masturbation is common and not at all unusual for someone his age. So I gently educated the parents and told them not to worry.

But they were still anxious and wanted some blood tests, so I happily obliged. The kid got his blood sucked out for no apparent reason, but at least it dissuaded some fear from the parents. [addsig]




Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by Gwil on Fri Mar 18th at 4:51pm 2005


The horny little tyke.. who would have thought toddlers got pleasure from bashing the bishop.

Truly, truly bizarre..
[addsig]




Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by thursday- on Fri Mar 18th at 4:51pm 2005


This made me chuckle. God, I love you Americans
[addsig]




Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by Leperous on Fri Mar 18th at 5:00pm 2005


What a fun job you have





Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by DrGlass on Fri Mar 18th at 5:30pm 2005


what, do we forget untilll we are like 13?
[addsig]




Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by Andrei on Fri Mar 18th at 5:42pm 2005


Two year-olds can masturbate? But I thought sperm production starts at puberty?
[addsig]




Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by satchmo on Fri Mar 18th at 6:42pm 2005


Even unborn babies masturbate. With today's advanced prenatal ultrasound, obstetricians have frequently catch fetus "in the act" during routine obstetric visits. I guess babies get horny too.

Yes, sperm production doesn't start until puberty, but that doesn't prevent infants from deriving pleasure. Male babies don't ejaculate when they masturbate (no semen yet), but they do reach orgasm.

[addsig]




Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by ieatmonkeychow on Fri Mar 18th at 6:52pm 2005


haha. This is a funny one.

I kind of remember doing this myself. But its not very clear.

I didnt act like that though, lol.





Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by DrGlass on Fri Mar 18th at 9:09pm 2005


so I missed out on like 10 years of self plesure? darn
[addsig]




Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by satchmo on Fri Mar 18th at 9:22pm 2005


? quoting DrGlass
so I missed out on like 10 years of self plesure? darn

Well, you can always make it up by doing more now. It's not too late until you break your arm.

[addsig]




Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by fishy on Fri Mar 18th at 9:50pm 2005


if your lucky, it'll only be your arm [addsig]



Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by Andrei on Fri Mar 18th at 9:57pm 2005


? quote:

Yes, sperm production doesn't start until puberty, but that doesn't prevent infants from deriving pleasure. Male babies don't ejaculate when they masturbate (no semen yet), but they do reach orgasm.



This is very interesting since I have always considered the pleasure of masturbating to be directly linked to ejaculation and not to the sensation obtained by massaging the penis.
[addsig]




Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by DrGlass on Fri Mar 18th at 10:08pm 2005


? quote:

? quote:

Yes, sperm production doesn't start until puberty, but that doesn't prevent infants from deriving pleasure. Male babies don't ejaculate when they masturbate (no semen yet), but they do reach orgasm.



This is very interesting since I have always considered the pleasure of masturbating to be directly linked to ejaculation and not to the sensation obtained by massaging the penis.


orgazum without ejaculation is the key to male multible orgasm.
[addsig]




Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by Spartan on Fri Mar 18th at 10:18pm 2005


Lol I can't stop laughing at how your trying so hard to be serious when your sitting here talking about toddlers having orgasms and massaging your peewee. I can see now why there are no girls on this forum. [addsig]



Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by Orpheus on Fri Mar 18th at 10:33pm 2005


I had not heard of males doing it, because the testis are nonfunctional till puberty, i don't doubt it happens, i just had not heard of it.

females on the other hand, are born with a fully functional clitoris and can achieve orgasm while still in diapers. this i had heard many,many times throughout my life.

the ovaries do not mature till puberty, but have no roll in sexual pleasure making.

i do not recommend having sex with little girls, but self sex is a perfectly acceptable event IMO.

i had always thought, "those lucky bitches, if they wanted to they could have been having orgasms their whole f**king lives.. what the f**k are they waiting for?"

[addsig]




Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by satchmo on Fri Mar 18th at 10:35pm 2005


Hey, I think this thread is the very reason why we might attract girls to the Pit. Wouldn't you think they'll be fascinated by the topic? They certainly don't have any personal experience, like what we're sharing now. They shall be truly enlightened by the discussion. [addsig]



Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by Orpheus on Fri Mar 18th at 10:41pm 2005


? quoting satchmo
Hey, I think this thread is the very reason why we might attract girls to the Pit. Wouldn't you think they'll be fascinated by the topic? They certainly don't have any personal experience, like what we're sharing now. They shall be truly enlightened by the discussion.

I find it very difficult to accept that we would acquire female mappers just because we are fixated on their genitalia.

if that were true, we would have had a few hundred.... thousand by now.

i also doubt many here could properly describe masturbation to a female. i don't doubt that they know how to do themselves, but pleasing a female properly is not generally a priority for males under 30.





Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by Cassius on Fri Mar 18th at 11:04pm 2005


? quoting Andrei
Two year-olds can masturbate?

No - apparently, only American two year olds can masturbate. Thanks, thursday.





Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by Orpheus on Fri Mar 18th at 11:10pm 2005


? quoting Cassius

, only American two year olds can masturbate.

with the advent of the new avatar bud, may i ask if thats the finger you use to... ahem, you do have a girlfriend, right? i almost asked a silly question about your fingers, before i even confirmed your dating status.

[addsig]




Quote
Re: The pleasure of my own company
Posted by satchmo on Fri Mar 18th at 11:15pm 2005


? quote:
only American two year olds can masturbate

I guess all that Puritan teaching from our forefathers has gone out the window.

[addsig]





Post Reply