Snarkpit Forum Index » General Banter » Best Quotes
Best Quotes
« previous page 123
...
4
Post Reply
Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by Pegs on Sat Jun 11th at 1:22pm 2005

What do you mean you drank more than i did? - EQ2
Im not arragont, im just better than you - My mate




Yes, My spelling is still terrible!



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by Orpheus on Sun Jun 12th at 1:32pm 2005

? quoting Dr Brasso
"of course ill marry you.....can i have a set of keys to the firebird??" ---my wife...

"but dad, it wasnt me", followed a close second by "but, but, but...." and, "idont know"... ---my youngest daughter

Doc B...

For all the best family quotes rent/watch the video "Bill Cosby Himself"

You will laugh yourself into hysterics..





The best things in life, aren't things.



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by $loth on Sun Jun 12th at 8:34pm 2005

please don't hate me but this one is from Friends;

Ross: Oh really? What uh, what does he want with her?
Chandler: Well, I'm guessing he wants to do a little dance. . . ya know, make a little love. . . well pretty much get down tonight.




Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by SpiKeRs on Sun Jun 12th at 10:07pm 2005

A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you're a great guy, but I don't like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we're not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we're going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn't work out, we'll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.

Taken from Bash.org. I particularly like for reasons you can probably figure :P




Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by gimpinthesink on Mon Jun 13th at 11:30pm 2005

Interesting One minute you mock my sweaty ballsack and now you want to cuddle with it - one of the three guys to the other two from With out a Paddle


<B><A HREF="http://www.ben-hodgson.co.uk" TARGET="_blank">Tinterweb site</A></B>
<B><A HREF="http://gimpinthesink.deviantart.com" TARGET="_blank">Deviantart</A></B>

<FONT COLOR=gold>Human knowledge belongs to the world</FONT>



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by pepper on Tue Jun 14th at 2:13pm 2005

Here are a few quotes from the o'hara international airport.

"How far behind traffic are we?"
"Three miles."
"That doesn't look like three miles to us!"
"You're a mile and a half from him, he's a mile and a half from you...that's three miles."

"Approach, what's our sequence?"
"Calling for the sequence I missed your callsign, but if I find out what it is, you're last."

"For radar identification throw your jumpseat rider out the window."

"I am way too busy for anybody to cancel on me."

"Citation 123, if you quit calling me center, I'll quit calling you twin Cessna."

"Put your compass on 'E' and get out of my airspace."

"Caution wake turbulence you're following a heavy 12 o'clock, three ... no, let's make it five miles."

"Japan Air Ten Heavy, how 'bout a radio check?"
(Response -"Rogah, switching!")

"Approach, how far from the airport are we in minutes?"
"N923, the faster you go, the quicker you'll get here."

"I don't mind altitude separation as long as they're not on top of each other."

"We were told Rwy 9...we'll take out the 14R approach plate."
"Captain you got sixty miles to take it out...have a ball."

"I can see the country club down below...look's like a lot of controllers out there!"
"Yes, sir, there is...and they're caddying for DC-10 drivers like you."

"Request Runway 27 Right."
"Unable."
"Approach, do you know the wind at six thousand is 270 at fifty?"
"Yeah, I do, and if we could jack the airport up to fifty-five hundred you could have that runway. Expect 14 Right."

I love em!



RUST Gamedesign
pepper design

The strength of the turbulence is directly proportional to the temperature of your coffee.



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by Orpheus on Wed Jun 15th at 1:19pm 2005

"If dental floss wasn't meant to be eaten, why are they mint flavored" - Family Guy.



The best things in life, aren't things.



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by Windows 98 on Wed Jun 15th at 1:53pm 2005

640K ought to be enough for anybody. - Bill Gates '81

Ever notice how fast Windows runs? Neither did I.

Pentiums melt in your PC, not in your hand.

As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.

Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.

Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. -- President and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977

Never let a computer know you're in a hurry.

No electrons were harmed in the creation of this message.

THINK -- it gives you something to do while the computer is down.

To err is human. To really screw things up you need a computer.

Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons. -- Popular Mechanics, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949

But what ... is it good for? -- Engineer at the Advanced Computing Systems Division of IBM, 1968, commenting on the microchip.

With computers, every morning is the dawn of a new error.




http://img362.imageshack.us/img362/8521/windows981dk.jpg

Nickelplate is my dad



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by French Toast on Thu Aug 25th at 6:20am 2005

Not sure if I saw this one here, or on a different forum. But either way it must be shown.

This is Mark Twain's suggestions for improving the English Language;


For example, in Year 1 that useless letter "c" would
be dropped to be replased either by "k" or "s", and
likewise "x" would no longer be part of the
alphabet. The only kase in which "c" would be
retained would be the "ch" formation, which will be
dealt with later. Year 2 might reform "w" spelling,
so that "which" and "one" would take the same
konsonant, wile Year 3 might well abolish "y"
replasing it with "i" and Iear 4 might fiks the "g/j"
anomali wonse and for all.

Jenerally, then, the improvement would kontinue
iear bai iear with Iear 5 doing awai with useless
double konsonants, and Iears 6-12 or so
modifaiing vowlz and the rimeining voist and
unvoist konsonants. Bai Iear 15 or sou, it wud
fainali bi posibl tu meik ius ov thi ridandant letez
"c", "y" and "x" -- bai now jast a memori in the
maindz ov ould doderez -- tu riplais "ch", "sh", and
"th" rispektivli.

Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform,
wi wud hev a lojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe
Ingliy-spiking werld.



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by Crapceeper on Thu Aug 25th at 9:32am 2005

"Do you think god lives in heaven because he is afraid of what he created?"
-Romero, Spy Kids 2


Never try to be perfect - just try it and make the best out of it



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by rival on Thu Aug 25th at 7:50pm 2005

"We're coming to kill, We're coming to chill, We're coming now, we will." - one of the singers from 311

"Hell is other people."
- Jean-Paul Sartre

"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."
- Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977

"Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn't cure."
- Ross MacDonald




Bullet Control: $5000 for a bullet.
&quot;I would blow your f**king head off! ...if I could afford it. I'm gonna get another job, start saving some money... then you a dead man!&quot;



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by rs6 on Thu Aug 25th at 8:33pm 2005

Excessive heat is the most common cause of computer component failure, but being stupid with the soldering iron is a close second.

Good News: You finally tracked down the cause of the server crash at work. Bad News: It was your pr0n collection.

Patience is a virtue. Especially when downloading movies on a 56K connection.

Installing Windows XP on your office PCs turns out to be a bad idea when you realize your 512MB of RAM are now all dedicated to Windows Media Player 7.

Ninety degree heat and five P4 systems in one room, time to over clock the AC.


Because of bankruptcy, you are forced back to using dial-up. Apparently there are fates worse than hell.

I believe this one was on nickelplate's sig at one point, I liked it so mush i stole it and its now on my AIM profile:
There are 10 types of people in this world, those who understand binary and those who don't.



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by Hugh on Thu Aug 25th at 9:11pm 2005

It's from Bash, originally... Nickelplate is as original as I am, haha.



One day you'll know what you're talking about, I can hardly imagine

Maps! - Audio blog!



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by FatStrings on Fri Aug 26th at 1:24am 2005

my siggy it's quoted from anonymous but its in lamb by christopher moore

God has a hard on for Marines, because we kill everything we see. He plays His games, we play ours. To show our appreciation for so much power, we keep heaven packed with fresh souls. God was here before the marine corps, so you can give your heart to Jesus, but your ass belongs to the corps!
-Drill Instructor (Full Metal Jackedt)

Team America World Police

Spottswoode: From what I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.N.C.E has gathered, it would be 9/11 times 100.
Gary Johnston: 9/11 times a hundred? Jesus, that's...
Spottswoode: Yes, 91,100.
Chris: Basically, all the worst parts of the bible.


Chris: Let's get one thing straight, actor. I don't trust you. And if you betray us, I'll rip your f**king balls off and stuff them up your ass so that the next time you s**t, you'll s**t all over your balls, got it?


GaryJohnston: OK, a limosine that can fly. Now I have seen everything.
Spottswoode: Really? Have you seen a man eat his own head?
GaryJohnston: No.
Spottswoode: So then, you haven't seen everything.




Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by gimpinthesink on Fri Aug 26th at 2:37am 2005

Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Arthor - I am Arthor King of the Britains
Pesant - King of the who?
Arthor - The Britains
Pesant - Well who are they then?

French Taunter - You don't frighten us, English pig-dogs! Go and boil your
bottoms, sons of a silly person. I blow my nose at you,
so-called Arthur-king, you and all your silly English kaniggets.

French Taunter - I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed
animal food trough water! I fart in your general direction! You
mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!

Arthor - Come Patsy

Mortician - Who's that then?
Customer - I don't know.
Mortician - Must be a king.
Customer - Why?
Mortician - He hasn't got s**t all over him.

Woman - Well, 'ow did you become king then?
Arthur - The Lady of the Lake, [angels sing] her arm clad in the
purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of
the water signifying by Divine Providence that I, Arthur, was to
carry Excalibur. [singing stops] That is why I am your king!
Dennis - Listen -- strange women lying in ponds distributing
swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive
power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some
farcical aquatic ceremony.
Arthur - Be quiet!
Dennis - Well you can't expect to wield supreme executive power
just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!
Arthur - Shut up!
Dennis - I mean, if I went around sayin' I was an emperor just
because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me they'd
put me away!

King Arthur

Its like a babys arm holding an apple


<B><A HREF="http://www.ben-hodgson.co.uk" TARGET="_blank">Tinterweb site</A></B>
<B><A HREF="http://gimpinthesink.deviantart.com" TARGET="_blank">Deviantart</A></B>

<FONT COLOR=gold>Human knowledge belongs to the world</FONT>



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by WarloK on Fri Aug 26th at 2:38pm 2005

"Why should i clean my room when the rest of the world is in a mess," Me to my Mum.

"Strike or be Struck," Me to my friend before he hit me in the face.

"Its the rabbit with the big sharp pointy teeethe!" That weirdo out of Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

"Ze Vine is vary, vary dry an ze sauce is vary,vary reech," The Waiter out of Monty Python and the meaning of life.





Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by rival on Fri Aug 26th at 6:52pm 2005

"im always up for some man sausage once in a while..." - Anynomous


Bullet Control: $5000 for a bullet.
&quot;I would blow your f**king head off! ...if I could afford it. I'm gonna get another job, start saving some money... then you a dead man!&quot;



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by WarloK on Fri Aug 26th at 11:09pm 2005

ROFL!!!



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by Nickelplate on Sun Aug 28th at 6:30am 2005

"Stop product testing on animals! Use PETA members!"
-me




I tried sniffing coke, but the ice cubes kept getting stuck in my nose.
http://www.dimebowl.com



Quote
 Re: Best Quotes
Posted by HAL 9000 AI computer on Sun Aug 28th at 6:54am 2005

'This is why evil will always triumph... because good is dumb'
-Spaceballs





« previous page 123
...
4
Post Reply