Posted by Damic on Sat Jan 22nd 2005 at 8:45pm

Thx Gwil, but thats B1 and now im making b2 , houses, lights, aliens away, ...

Now im stuck in the errors and is a hovercraft a good idea?

The shop (green light) is now a weapon store with a hole in the back for getting in 2 ways , tunnel gonna be redone (to many errors )

etc. etc. etc.

btw I've updated the pics allsow

Posted by Gwil on Fri Jan 14th 2005 at 7:59pm

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EDIT EDIT EDIT! LONG POST FOLLOWS! ALL OPINIONS ARE ENTIRELY OBJECTIVE AND ARE MEANT IN THE BEST POSSIBLE SPIRIT!

</obligatory disclaimer>

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I notice you have acknowledge the bugs in your map already, so I will not focus too much on them. You seem to have grasped the basics fairly well, lighting, construction etc - but there are a few errors of brushes overlapping/dead ends and holes in the world.

I like how you have included vertical combat already, even if it is a little limited.

I had a look round, and this is what I saw to fix, or improve



First thing I noticed - the underground areas, are too dark. It was difficult to navigate around the collapsed road area. A few more ceiling lights are needed, and the red should be toned down a little. Notice also how I can see behind the road into the sky. It needs a pile of rubble underneath it to make it realistic, and to block out the access to the skybox.


More of the same - too dark underground and the sky is showing through again.


The building on the left looks odd with the half slanted roof - and the building next to it too. You can include things like support struts, door frames, window frames to add detail. Try perhaps cutting it in half just above head height, and using a different texture for two different floors.

Notice how the light above the door is off, but is giving off light also. And the crates? They were nicely stacked in a tower (I presume to get to the top of the building), but you should really cut down the number of prop_physics. Including the cones and barrels, there was at least 20-30 physics objects in an area not really suited to it.



The road is too dark again - it might be my settings, but I have played other maps where the lighting was adequate. The biggest problem outdoors was the use of those buildings - I presume they are props ? When you approach them, the textures and scaling is completely off.

I would suggest building houses by hand, and setting back those blocks of flats further where they cannot be reached by the player.

Might also be nice to have the lampposts have the beams coming from. Look again also at the park on the right - the statue is not lit in the same level as the map, Im not sure how to fix it, but it sticks out.



See what I mean a few brick walls made from brushes with houses in front of these will hide the ugly prop textures. They look good as part of the map, but you shouldnt be able to get this close. They are designed to be things on the landscape


Why I took this, I don't know </Orph syndrome> I think it is because of the darkness, and the use of prop buildings again.



The stairs - they look wrong. At least cut back the opening in the floor, or give them a handrail. They look like lego at the moment!

Once again, there was too many props in here - 2 radiators, a couple of tables, and some cabinets all on the bottom floor. Oddy enough there was hardly anything upstairs.

Look to the right, the textures on the wall are misaligned - also, I would use another texture, or at least split the wall into two where the texture has the "damp" marks on it. At the moment it looks a little odd.

The door - is openable, something usually avoided in deathmatch. Remove the door altogether and leave it as an open frame. I didnt find this building right away because of the door being shut, and in the dark.

One more thing - where is the light coming from? God?



Again, texturing issues - this doesn't feel like a real room or building when I get inside. The damp is in two different places on the concrete wall (right hand side) and the corrugated wall... I couldn't understand. Try to think realism when creating city levels

The hole in the roof is a nice touch BUT! perhaps thicken the ceiling, or add roof supports/broken truss material around the broken part.

Again, where is the light coming from? Get some light fixtures in here!



I can't remember what I was going to say here, bar the texture issues. You need window frames! Or supports for the ceiling, or walls. At the moment it's a box with two windows, not a room in a building.

The glass windows are overlapping with the surrounding wall, and it causes flickerg in game (just remembered!)


I got trapped down here - it is near or behind the park. Go read up on clip brushes to stop such things happening. Notice again the blurry prop textures.



Clip brushes needed - at this point I fell out the world, and saw some of the bigger construction errors. Your work needs to be tidier, a lot tidier, without wanting to sound horrible (and I know its your first map)



Darkness! Please, please adda little moonlight or some more streetlamps



Props need to be cut down drastically - considering the layout problems (i'll talk about that later), there is far too many, and servers suffer from lots of physics objects being thrown around.

Also, why is there barrles stacked in the middle of the road? As I say, try and think realism and making the level feel "alive".



Mars attacks. This green light is horribly coloured, and looks odd shing upward like that. I would suggest. Remove it and two smaller lights slightly above the shop sign, and at at either end (like this (o) ____________ (o) ((o) being lights).

Window frames, door frames, again are needed. I would also raise the building off the ground a little more, so you can add a step or two up into the doorway.



Long sight lines and fighting areas, but this is pretty much all there is too the level - I note it is 50% complete. Perhaps add another road on the other side of the buildings, running parallel to the one you have already. It would add a reason for the connection alleys you have between the buildings.



Box room, odd choice of textures again - light fixtures, texture alignment and variation and detailing made with brushes is needed to give this room soul.

Once more, too many props that can be thrown (including those odd looking file cabinets stacked skew wiff on top of each other - fix those, or delete them I reckon)



Better shot of how the stairs look odd, and the texturing of the wall. Where it moves from light to dark you could add a border, or coving for instance.



Left window illustrates texture flickering.



Out the level again, this time via the park area - I left at this point as I had seen the level all the way through, and needed to illustrate further how the map needs tidying up.

General points -

Textures - be creative, but think realistic. Some buildings had walls made from 3 different materials, and it just looked out of place. Quite a lot of the textures have windows and doors on them. Work around those texture features to splice up your architecture too.

Lighting - dark, dark and more dark. Aside from adding a few more streetlights, there wasn't much else to say on the matter. Indoor areas were lit well BUT, the lights had no apparent source Make your level live! Make it believable!

Brushwork - this is the biggest issue. There were lots of gaps in the level where I could fall out, this was my main concern. Make sure your level is watertight, airtight, bomb proof whatever - it needs to be sealed and secured.

A lot of the situations could be fixed with clip brushes, as on several occasions I walked out via ramps or raised grass (in the park, for example).

The other concern was the overuse of props to detail your level - yes, its easy, yes it looks nice BUT! it is avoiding what level design is really about--making and creating worlds with brushes. Door frames, window frames, roof and wall supports. Simple things like this make your level beautiful, and more playable.

Item placement - nothing much to say, as the level wasn't finished. I did notice the most powerful weapons, or weapon ammo came in large clumps though. There was 4 rockets next to each other, 3 SMG grenades together. The revolver had 2 boxes ammo right next to it.. etc. Cut down the amounts to 1, or at most 2 and spread things out a little.

The prop_physics, also - cut these down by at least 2/3. There was up to 100 throwable objects in the level, far too many. Also, 6 explosive barrels next to each other. Physics gameplay is fun, but too much is boring, and lags the server

Wow. That was more than I expected to write, but there was a lot to say.

You seem to have the fundamentals down well, and it is a promising start - suffering from most of the common "newbie" errors, but nothing to disastrous. The setting looks nice and feels like City 17, and like I say, is a good start.

I hope my pointers will help - and the only other thing I can advise is look around at other authors work. See inspiration for how to create realistic buildings around the edge of the level, and make your creations feel real.

Good luck, and keep it up


[addsig]

Posted by Damic on Wed Jan 12th 2005 at 5:05pm

Added the download Now i must delete al the fun parts :'( + some bug fixing

Posted by habboi on Wed Dec 29th 2004 at 11:08pm

Its an ok map but 40% i cant say much at the moment