My Research Paper :o

http://snarkpit.com/pits/hugh/final.zip

It's titled "The Violence of Media as it Pertains to Reality" and I'm hoping that it's good. :razz: So like, comments or something.

Interesting subject, just don't feel like reading all that now :razz: , perhaps later. Is this some sort of school assignment?

You could include the point that if violent media causes violent behaviour, then why aren't we all going crazy?

Good read so far, didn't get to the end as I'm in a rush.

Otz: Yes, I have an English class focusing on research... naturally I'm biased, but the teacher said that was alright so long as I backed up my points.

TwoKnives: Well, I didn't want to put that in there, at least with that wording 'cause then I'd seem really biased. Thus, "if violent media is so corrupting to our innocent youth, we should be so grateful that they're acting so decently." I actually had a quote like that from elsewhere but didn't know where to put it in... I tell you, I'm not good at organizing papers.

Anyway, I'll have an update relatively soonish.

TwoKnives said:
You could include the point that if violent media causes violent behaviour, then why aren't we all going crazy?

Good read so far, didn't get to the end as I'm in a rush.

That's the same as the quote I saw likening saying "hmm, it works for me" about a computer problem as saying, "Oh, you broke your leg? Nope... mine works fine here..." Using that sort of example can't be taken all too seriously. What would work would be the quote you mentioned you had found, and then backing that up with the tidbits of info on how despite booming game sales and whatnot, violent crime is dropping nationwide. :smile:

I did a similar paper on the subject my senior year. Was interesting to find that there weren't any valid studies linking violence in media to real-life violence - some kids were as violent if not moreso after watching Mr. Rogers' neighborhood. The correlation was more with the time spent with media as opposed to the content within.

Yargh, I updated it somewhat, though I've yet to fit in the point about violent crime going down since... I'm lazy. I have a link to those stats in my email, though, so that's a plus. I added the point about how the content's more or less irrelevant since that's what the anti media-violence study that I found said anyway: "Nonviolent games can induce anger or arousal." Blegh. Good stuff I guess.

This is going to be somewhat in the style of a map critique so...

You have a great topic, good command of grammar and vocabulary, and are capable of turning out attractive prose. However, I don't much like the structure of your paper. It seems to me that it is just a loose collection of Statement::Counter-statement pairs. Clearly I share your view of the topic, but I don't think I'd find this very convincing where I a fence-sitter.

You are quite articulate on the micros-scale of a single paragraph, but surprisingly inarticulate on the broader scheme of organization. I would outline the structure of your paper like this:

<UL dir=ltr style="MARGIN-RIGHT: 0px">
[*] Hook (an anecdote that draws the reader's attention)

• A very long list of sound bite like statements and your counter arguments to those statements.

[*] Conclusion (the best, most organized, part I thought)
</UL>
While this is sort of okay for a short paper, it doesn't hold up in a work of the length that you have here. In my opinion the structure should run something like this:

• <LI dir=ltr>Hook (just like you did)</LI>
• Frame the argument.
  <UL>
• Tell us who the sides are and briefly outline their positions.

[*] Argument 1

• Outline in detail the "enemy" position. You my indulge in pointing out some weaknesses that you see in it, but only minimally.

[*] Argument 2

• Outline your counter argument in detail, with reference to specific points from argument 1, but again be brief on the attack.

[*] Compare and contrast the two arguments on the basis of supporting data, and logical validity. This is where you can be scathing, and hopefully demolish the other side.
[*] Draw your conclusions
[*] Summarize
</UL>
I'm sure there are any number of ways you might organize this, mine is only one. The sin you have committed is to almost entirely eschew organization. Anyway, I hope this was helpful. That's all it was meant to be.

I read most of it, everything I read sounded good (correct word usage, etc). Will your teacher (professor?) mind if you have so many questions in your report? Also, just to make it look a snappier, consider doing Times New Roman font, and justify everything except for the works cited :smile:

Nonono, to make it look professional you have to PDF it. Whip out your Latex and Distiller and whatnot :wink:

I like TexMacs ...