Thanks great idea Orph, I will reply back asap I have a meeting for a mod in our school. But the RPG is in the tunnel because the button in the big room up top there is a button that closes the the the grates and raises the water for those whom go to grab it. A trap =) I also never realized how many crossbows I had in the map until now. Thanks Orph, I'll start cracking asap.

<DIV class=quote>
<DIV class=quotetitle>? quoting Joe-Bob

It's nice. Basically the same thing, only a lot cleaner for the message boards. Unless you have something to generate them, though, it'll probably get painful write critiques before long.
</DIV></DIV>

used this
handy little proggy :smile:

I think I am going to start doing my critiques this way now.. :biggrin:
Opinions guys? I like this way better, but am willing to compromise.

It's nice. Basically the same thing, only a lot cleaner for the
message boards. Unless you have something to generate them,
though, it'll probably get painful write critiques before long.

I think I am going to start doing my critiques this way now.. :biggrin:

Opinions guys? I like this way better, but am willing to compromise.

Thanks Reno, the kind of reply I needed.

Displacement surfaces don't block VIS, so you need to put some sort of
solid brush behind them to seal the level. Normally you can either use
a nodraw or a skybrush so there aren't any extra faces getting drawn.

Thanks guys for the critiques. Adressing the problems now,

Screenshot 1: That area is really bland, I have been working on sprucing it up actually. I'm going to be adding some detail there in the forms of powerboxes and light switches. [Much like steamlabs]

Screenshot 2: I fixed that leak so all is good now, I honestly don't know how I got that big of a leak and didn't realize it.

Screenshot 3: I know I'm not suspsoed to put a big box around my map, but this is a map from Dave J that he never finished. So when I got my hands on it, it already had many leaks in which I should have fixed before I went about this process. I don't understand why the displacements in the map are considered leaks when you compile. So I don't understand how I'm going to fix those. Also the water in the map, if you are using func_water_analog and it sits beneath the world, does it have to be enclosed in structure or can it sit beneath there?

Screenshot 4: The pillar wasen't orginally there, but added indeed for flow. I have no problems getting up it at all, I just run and crouch jump [/me hopes Orph doesn't kill me] up on the pillar and bolts up. If you got an idea on how I could make it better please let me know.

Screenshot 5: That lighting problem was because I used a model/ texture on a brush. All is well now and I'm patching it up in the 2 spots that needed it. I have clip brushes in there but I may need to make them better.

Screenshot 6: The stairs, I see what you mean by this, perhaps I should clip them make them more and better.

Screenshot 7: The elevator, I have no clue why it does that at all. I'll have to give it a check on how to fix it.

Screenshot 8: I talked about it with cman2k last night, we are going to add a health charger there so it brings the player in that direction. I do see what you mean, doesn't make much sense at all.

Screenshot 9: Should leak the displacement should be fine, but I'll definatly check into it.

Screenshot 10: I do see what you mean now, and I shall limit whats in that room. That button triggers the steam trap that is right outside the door of that room, if that is what your talking about.

Screenshot 11: I fixed the one leak already I need to fix the small leak mentioned above. I need to learn how to use area portals and this map could look better. Any help with them I'd greatly appriciate.

Screenshot 12: Should I make every step a function detail, or tie them all to one? And should I up the brightness a little so you can see it better?

I need to add some detail on how I want the sounds to work, like the wind. I thought about using powerline above the holes that sway, or dust is a good idea too. Orph if you feel the need to drop in a line or what ever please do so. Thanks for all of the help and I already started work on some of this last night. :smile:

/me stops reading.. notices an Orph style critique present.

don't wanna ruin mine with preconceived notions.

One thing from me: I like hearing the wind howl in the large xbow area,
but there needs to be some visible sign of it. Perhaps something
attached to the edge of the hole flapping, or some dust sprites passing
along outside. Great work otherwise. :smile:

Your map really looks very nice on a whole. There are some spots that need a lot of help, however.



This is one of your low-detail spots. SOMETHING really needs to
be done in areas like these. The corners are especially
important, the boxy look just doesn't work in 3D games. However,
that's a very creative place to stick ar2_secondary ammo. A
gravity gun will get them out, but it takes a few seconds. Oh, by
the way, that secret area of yours is WAY too easy to get to, WAY to
easy to snipe from, and is right next to a magnum.



You placed a skybox of doom around your map. DON'T PUT YOUR
MAP INSIDE A BOX! To make matters worse, there's a leak in
this screenshot. Because of that leak, this room is visible from
various places on the map that it shouldn't be. (Wireframe around
a bit). Look at SDK_Lockdown for a great example of how to place
skyboxes in a mostly indoor level.



This is why you can't place a box around your map. Not only are
you wasting file size with all of this, you're making your compile much
longer, and you're drastically lowering performance.



This pillar can be climbed, which is a good thing. If it weren't,
that room would be a dead-end big enough to hurt map flow.
However, while it isn't too hard to get up playing alone, in deathmatch
it will be almost impossible. Fix that, or cut it off (which
would hurt map flow, BTW.)



The lighting here is all screwed up, and it's very noticable.
Also, use playerclips to make moving easier during high-intensity
battles or slight lag.



Another really boring area. Also, it's super hard to sprint up
and down. I keep on hitting my head on the top, and getting
caught on the rails. In SDK_Lockdown, railing collusions are
turned off, and a slanted playerclip is placed over the rail.



Fix the lighting on this elevator. Also, that elevator is
annoying. It's too slow for deathmatch, and dropping down is
almost impossible without having the elevator come up and do
damage. Also, the sides of it shouldn't touch the wall
completely, there should be some lip. That texture change is just
way too harsh!



This dead-end looks odd. You may want to make a more natural
curve to it, leading to the ramp. In other words, it looks like a
passage should be there, but inexplicably there is none. It seems
as well that this whole area is a twisty, similiar looking, and
all-around difficult to navigate. Consider an extra landmark to
guide the player.



There seems to be another leak into the skybox. Same problem as the first one.



This alcove is way too convenient for a camper. There's health,
armor, SMG secondary ammo, a shotgun, and shotgun shells. Oh, and
that button over there gives the player feedback on pressing +use, but
the developer console tells me that it does nothing. There should
be a flag you can check to disable feedback on +use.



Wow! This area looks rather nice! However, I get a nasty
performance hit in this room. I'm willing to bet that if you fix
that leak two pictures ago and redid the skybox as I told you too
earlier, it would be a whole lot better.



The lighting is awfully strange. I can't see the borders on those
stairs at all, for example. Also, you may want to make those
stairs into detail, since you have some small VIS leaves right there.

There are several big things that need immediate redress, but you should make sure to hit the list above too.

• Skybox of doom = BAD!

<div style="margin-left: 40px;">It's a nasty performance hit, and in deathmatch, life is often measured in FPS.

</div>

• Too much secondary ammo

<div style="margin-left: 40px;">SMG grenades and AR2 balls are
secondary for a reason, they're powerful and rare. I like how you
placed those two AR2 balls in that vent, but there are WAY too many
scattered around elsewhere. Same goes for contact grenades.

</div>

• Soundscapes

<div style="margin-left: 40px;">I like the wind sound.
However, in 90% of your map, the audio is dead. You'd be suprised
how much of a difference it makes to the subconscience. Open up
your console and see what soundscapes are used where, it would sure
help a lot!

</div>

• Doorways and stuff

<div style="margin-left: 40px;">You really need lips around
doorways. There are way too many places where a door converges
with a wall and there's a hard texture change. Outdent your doors
a little, and everything will look a lot nicer.

</div>