A Very Merry Christmas Story.

A Snarky Christmas Story: Created by the whole crew.

Twas two days before Christmas and all through the Pit not a member was stirring, not nary a twit.

(try hard to keep it true guys... please)

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There is no history until something happens, then there is.

i don't get it.

The Hammers were hung, by the chimney with care, in hopes an SDK update soon would be there.

But lurking over little vaders' shoulder was uncle scrooge steam, huffing and puffing, till he had to scream:

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-[Better to be Honest than Kind]-

Way off in the distance a sound could be heard. Was it ever a wonder, why things so absurd. Can it be that the members had faith, that the system would be fixed or continue to hate, and wish it unsafe.

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There is no history until something happens, then there is.

then i in my boxers, and ma in her cap, she got too excited, so i gave her a slap,

when outside the window, there came such a noise, i fell outta bed, and then jumped up with poise.....

Doc B.. :dodgy:

I was naked, I exclaimed, all red like rudolf,

I really was the idiot, like an old fool playing golf!

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-[Better to be Honest than Kind]-

(golf, how the hell can anyone continue after golf? )

Golf did you say, oh want for good cheer.

Can anyone think, I'd rather have beer.

Outside in the yard, all covered in snow.

was eight tiny reindeer and a fatman a glow.

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There is no history until something happens, then there is.

But along came a jumbo jet, and smashed him to the air,

Was santa screwed? It just didn't seem fair!

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-[Better to be Honest than Kind]-

Fair to the tots? That nobody cared?
For no one took notice St. Nick wasn't spared.

Not a policeman, and not Mickey Mouse,
Not the Gestapo, nor Carl Friedrich Gauss.
Not frazzled Tim Burton, or the killer from Scream
Nor Baron von Richthofen's plane painting team.

No one took notice, and nobody cared,
No one looked twice, except I, who stared...

the kids were all arguing and fights 'tween themselves,
damn what i'd give for a vacation in hell...

the stockings were hung in the bathroom upstairs,
must remember the light 'fore im caught unawares...

while walking the steps and talking aback,
i stepped on the cat and fell flat on my.......ass

was then startled anew by the ring of the phone,
and the kids are still fighting, i wish they were grown....

on the end of the line was my neighbor next door,
said. "did a fat guy just fall thru the roof to the floor?"

Doc Brasso... :dodgy:

Damn that fatass santa,
all orange from drinking fanta,
I shouted whilst out on my porch,
But with the beer in my hand,
and my shoes filled with sand,
I blinded the fat man with my torch.

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-[Better to be Honest than Kind]-

He screamed in agony

And my girl started shaggin me

I said it wasn't a good time

But it's the only thing that rhymed.

(growls deep in throat- lost my god damned reply again )

To Rhyme all the time, or not may be best,

Who's to care or think up the rest.

Rhyming may be, the best way to go,

but if it does not, we'll just have to sew.

Making a rhyme, doesn't have to be good,

'cause everyone thinks, if it happens, it should.

Rhyming may be, or maybe its not.

Mostly its 'cause, words we forgot.

Lets all remember, that this is a game,

So try to continue, and I'll do the same.

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There is no history until something happens, then there is.

And so Christmas is dawning,
and the children are yawning,
with presents all under the tree...
But where is dear santa?
and all of his banter?
With everyone smiling with glee.

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-[Better to be Honest than Kind]-

But we all know that,
santa needed to wee
but dont do it in your x-mas hat,
thatll make everyone flee.

But it was not to be,
for his hat is no longer red but yellow.
santa just had to pee
but wait whats that sound, starting to bellow?

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It was good ol' St Nick himself,
That wonderous fellow!

He had arrived just in time
as the bells started to chime
to deliver the presents
and fight the evils of crime!

Christmas was saved,
and all was now good,
for the snarkpitters lay quiet,
and had s**t, showered and shaved!

(I love changing the ryhme styling to suit my lyrics lol!)

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-[Better to be Honest than Kind]-

Except for some like me

Who are too young to shave

We s**t we showered and went to bed early.

woo!

we say it in prayer or we say it too strong,
and we hope the the folks here wont take this wrong,
its gone just a bit goofy or a bit much in length
and posting amidst this just zaps all my strength

so just a few messages before i go,
and we'll all still be friends, at least i hope so....
to jon, cass, yak, leperous and the other "old" farts :razz:
to the newbies and bootcamps, most still missing the art

to gollums, and cj's, and the ones back from the muck
and the killbox designers that dont give a ....fudge
may your new years be fruitful, or with fiber at least,
im an old fart, and ive tamed that beast... :heee:

a new year approaching, and its arriving fast
savor the moments, and make the good ones last
ah, a special note to frenchy i could have put down in song
boy, youve lost yer damn mind.....put down the damn bong!

so off to the kids land for frolic and fun
and wait for the credit bills..."hon, wheres my gun?"
be of good mind and soul, body and cheer,
merry christmas to all....now wheres my damn beer?

merry christmas and happy new year to all... :wink:

Doc Brasso... :dodgy:

Christmas and Snarkpit, one thing we can share,
Tis friendships and feelings, all kinds to beware,
Christmas the time, for oldtimers and new,
To gain some respect, for those before you.

Snarkpit and Christmas, a time to forgive,
Snarkpit's the place, we all would have lived,
If only the time, we all would have stayed,
more to the point, we stay anyway.

A tribute to old, or a tribute to new,
we all should be thankful, for Lep and his crew,
If Snarkpit should falter, or begin to grow old,
lets all hope we can, continue to hold.

Snarkpit remains, for all but a few,
lets all just have hope, we gain some anew,
Lets all give thanks, to those who have made,
Snarkpits the place, we all came and played.

Merry Christmas fellas.
Jon & Brenda Rickenbacker

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The best things in life, aren't things.