How many gollums does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

How many forum members does it take to change a light bulb or why some threads get sooooooo long?

1 to change the light bulb.

1 to post that the light bulb has been changed.

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.

27 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs.

53 to flame the spell checkers.

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as anal-retentive.

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp".

15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct.

109 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a light bulb forum.

111 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum.

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty.

27 to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs.

14 to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URLs.

27 to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group.

33 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too".

12 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy.

19 to quote the "Me too's" to say "Me three".

4 to suggest that the admins set up a FAQ.

44 to ask what is a "FAQ"?

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

143 to say "do a search on 'light bulbs' before posting questions about light bulbs".

And last but certainly not least...
1 new forum member to respond to the original post 6 months from now an to start it all over again.

(originally posted by GrantK, Sigforum)

And then vash to come and f**k it all up!

takes off pants

who rattled his^ cage?

and then the forum uberlord locks the topic and bans vash!

bewbies, i believe one of your numbers is incorrect...i believe it takes 3 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp".

MUAHAHA :biggrin:

P.S. very funny, 1 forum noob to start it all over again...HAHAHA

OUT FREAKIN' STANDING BOOBS...GJ ROFLMAO!!!

boobies.....God of lightbulbs...er...lamps!!

Doc Brass.... :dodgy:

boobies.. stoppit doc, i am on my last package of depends and its only wednesday..

I have long believed that brevity is the soul of wit - almost as long as I've failed to live by my beliefs :biggrin:

As such, I offer an alternative analysis of the problem:

Q How many Gollums does it take to change a lightbulb?

A None. Gollum does not deal with such prosaic matters. He will quite happily sit at his computer in the dark explaining the finer points of Half-Life mapping to all and sundry, whether they want to listen or nay. Most of these people are never going to make a map worth playing, but he does it anyway, because he likes to help them.

Only when he's finished helping them all - the talented ones and the morons, and everyone in-between - will he attend to lighting his room.

What an idiot he must be to waste his time so :rolleyes:

---

Ahem

Er.....on a lighter note, I have actually managed to put a screw-fitting lightbulb into a bayonet-fitting socket before, thus shorting the whole house :biggrin: So there's another reason that no Gollums can change lightbulbs.

my God....i cant see.....ROFLMFAO!!!!!

*****reaches for oxygen mask, and handiwipes....

Doc B.....

mikee, yer killin me .....

Heh, i didnt write that... it's been travelin around the forums, and i thought it fit well in here =P

I needed a name for the thread title.. and i thought "whose buttons do i want to push..?"

then it hit me! =D

Oi, keep away from my buttons yon scallywag!

....and that from a man who nails colored boxes to his wall...... :biggrin:

Doc B....still laffin my ass off....

slams fist on keyboard

thats enuff, i have changed pants twice now.. enuff already

....and that from a man who nails colored boxes to his wall...... :biggrin:

You say it like it's not normal

Besides, they're not nailed to the walls - they just kinda float mysteriously. Some of them are half-way into the floor too. Confuses the hell out of my scout when she comes hoovering on Tuesdays :biggrin:

Are we talking Spot Lamps - err Light Bulbs ( lite Bulbs ) or just Func_Light Bulbs..

You people need jobs! :razz:

so thats 891 forum members all together :razz:

well some of them are the same members posting more than once.. :razz:

but it's an 891 post long topic :biggrin:

You bothered to add it up? :eek:

yep :mrT:

/runs

ya know, now that i think about it, the law of physics tells me that mass vs. quantity states that gollum cant fit in a lightbulb, er, lamp, let alone a partner... :dodgy:

Doc Brass....extremely :dodgy:

.

Hey, Bewbies, that's a fun one. laughing

i should not be allowed to have so much fun with a post, as i curiously find myself searching for more ways to poke fun at my mentors ....but i can honestly say, i have never ever tried to stuff my big ass in a lightbulb, er, lamp... :heee:

Doc Brass... :dodgy:

Make sure it's plugged in for extra wrestling intro style pyrotechnics and fun.

Dr Brasso said:
ya know, now that i think about it, the law of physics tells me that mass vs. quantity states that gollum cant fit in a lightbulb, er, lamp, let alone a partner... :dodgy:

Doc Brass....extremely :dodgy:

Hmmm, I'm not sure from what torturously-oblique reference you drew this link (or the follow-up). But to carry on the madness......

I get that complaint from my partners all the time :mrT:

ROFLMAO!!!....my my my.....serious horses**t runs quite deep doesnt it....??

Doc B... :dodgy: