Valentine's Day

Just a little piece I wrote for another site, figured I'd post it here too

As you all know, today is Valentine?s Day?the cruelest of holidays. No other holiday separates the ?haves? and ?have-nots? like Valentine?s Day. Just think about it, an entire day solely devoted to celebrating your significant other. What if you don?t have anyone? No other holiday is like this. Halloween is about celebrating candy, if you don?t have any, you can just walk around ringing doorbells and you?ll get it for free. Those without explosives on the Fourth of July can head down to a local park where the local government has purchased plenty for everyone. But, unless you live near a friendly brothel in <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" /><st1:State><st1:place>Nevada</st1:place></st1:State>, there is no free love to go around on Valentine?s Day.


Think of it this way: what if there were a holiday called Private Jet Day? Isn?t that just a little unfair to the millions of people without private jets? Or how about Original Rembrandt Day, where all the art collectors can gather, mix some really odd drinks involving fermented coconut, and celebrate their original Rembrandts. Gee, everyone can enjoy that! Hell, I couldn?t even celebrate Fake Rembrandt Day! Or perhaps there?s this new holiday called Big House Day. Traditionally you go to the store and you can buy these little candy plaques to hang up all over your house to show how much you love it. They only come in packages of one hundred, though, so you?re left with a whole bunch of disgusting candy to eat if you don?t have a big enough house. And each one has a little phrase on it, just to further rub it in how big of a house it is. Things like: ?Live Here 4Ever!? ?Three Cheers for the Chandelier!? and, finally, the disturbingly popular ?Foyer Fever!?



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Well, just to ease the burden on the millions of Americans like myself, I have rechristened February 14<SUP>th</SUP> to a holiday [i]everyone can celebrate. Say hello to Green Elvis Tattoo Day! C'mon guys, roll up your sleeves and show em off! [color=white]Watch this, I can make mine dance. "Hey, Baby. Thank you, thank you very much!"[/i][/color]

Couldnt agree more!

I dunno, maybe if the people who bemoan V-Day weren't so whiny and needy and angsty someone might actually want to date their sorry asses?

Just a thought... :razz:

(mind you, if I wasn't dating someone right now I'd probably be grouchy too... just like I have been every other v-day)

Jinx, that's bulls**t. If you're a quiet friendly person and not an asshole you get nothing. Girls will become your friends and then find other guys to f**k. :razz:

so your saying that if i become a asshole, i get chicks?
cause pain to others for persnoal enjoyment?
sounds sadistic. :razz:

Gah, this is supposed to be a funny post. Be funny or don't come here at all, poopyheads.

Jinx, that's bulls**t. If you're a quiet friendly person and not an asshole you get nothing. Girls will become your friends and then find other guys to f**k. :razz:

Not with enough time, my hairy warrior... :razz:

Goddamn, that sounds terrible. Oops.

And why doesn't the flippin' automatically created post for the quote even work? I fart at thee... or something similarly threatening. (Yes, easy to see how I ended up engaged :razz: )

no offense andrew, but the engagement is the easy part.... **me contemplates the evil after honeymoon is over with... j/k

.....and as usual, im still in the valentines day doghouse....forget that im a busy man, with responsibilities, commitments etc...you forget the damn flowers and yer in a world of s**t....much like being a single geek again.... :wink:

....only the names are changed... :wink:

Doc Brass... :dodgy:

Yak, if you were an honest quiet friendly person, I don't think you'd necessarily want all the chicks you treat like your friends in the sack, either.

Not that women aren't the bane of my f**kin' existence here, but you really have to be fair; women tend to take sex a lot more seriously, so you can't disrespect them for not giving it up whenever you expect to get your mack on.

V-day was just awkward this year. i just started dating this girl a week ago, and BAM there's this big awkward day on the cllender. I couldn't simply ignore it, but I also didn't want to frighten her away by making a big deal out of it... you see the delema? things worked out well, but IMO V-day is completely useless.

rolls up sleeve, flexing to make elvis dance

Cassius said:
Yak, if you were an honest quiet friendly person, I don't think you'd necessarily want all the chicks you treat like your friends in the sack, either.

Not that women aren't the bane of my f**kin' existence here, but you really have to be fair; women tend to take sex a lot more seriously, so you can't disrespect them for not giving it up whenever you expect to get your mack on.

Oh no, I was just being bitter about being alone. Move along now.

Tracer Bullet said:
V-day was just awkward this year. i just started dating this girl a week ago, and BAM there's this big awkward day on the cllender. I couldn't simply ignore it, but I also didn't want to frighten her away by making a big deal out of it... you see the delema?

I was in a similar boat... we'd gone out on three dates, and we were both working/busy on the weekend so it was a little awkward to find the right thing to do. We both work at the same place, though, so I left her a little container I got and filled with Hersey Kisses and a funny card... seemed to be just right, she really liked it, but it wasn't anything too much.

My lady doesn't like Valentine's...at least the consumerism of it, which I have no problem with since I'm strapped for cash right now. Basically I made some sweet lovin' and saved money, fancy that. Now that's love.

[edit]Oh, and chocolate from outside sources never hurt anyone, free, free, free.[/edit]

I ended up going for a single white rose. A bit serious, but it seemed to go over quite well :smile:

valetine's day acts as a reminder for couples to share their love in a special way. it also acts as a reminder for the lonely that they are still alone since the last feb. 14th.

i went into avalon city for the night with some friends here on the island. since they all went with a date, they 'hooked me up' with this girl Kelly. i swear to f*cking god... maybe if i talked about Cher 24/7 like her, we coulda had some chemistry. though, catalina island is a really romantic plaaaace... any couples here in southern california ought to pay a visit :wink:

Jinx said:
so I left her a little container I got and filled with Hersey Kisses and a funny card... seemed to be just right, she really liked it, but it wasn't anything too much.

[rant]
Hershey? My god man! America really needs decent chocolate. When I was there, I sampled some of this so-called "food", and quite literally gagged on it. You guys over there gotta get yourself some of the real stuff...
[/rant]

OK, now thats over... V-day! Whats the point?

Hmm... seems I'm passionate about my quality chocolate, yet I seem to have little to say about the issue at hand... bleah! :dorky:

Tracer Bullet said:
I ended up going for a single white rose. A bit serious, but it seemed to go over quite well :smile:

honestly TB, im impressed....its amazing to me how all the ladies ive ever been with have found that the subtle gestures from the heart are the ones that make the biggest impact...of course, thats been 25+years ago, but my wife, well, shes exactly the same way....the problem is, the older i get, the MORE i forget, so im just gonna move into the doghouse permanently, and try to turn groveling into an art form (c).... :heee:

Doc Brass... :dodgy:

and i could never keep track of all the different symbolisms that go with each type, color, quantity, etc of the appropriate flower for the occasion, and the symbol, and the.....aww, f**k it..."move over dog"...

I guess impressing a lady is all about knowing what button to push, some like gifts, some like time, some like words, some like acts of service, some like physical touch, know what floats her boat and exploit it.

I've always found it easiest to, you know . . . ask lol.

It usually helps, because she knows my hearts in the right place, I expect the same from her, so.

Also, she loves/appreciates anything I actually do for her. Which is odd, feel like I owe her or something . . . weird. Anyway .. . Look over there! Half-Life 2! runs

you forget the damn flowers and yer in a world of s**t

I just don't get this need to be bought things. It's as if a woman doesn't believe that somebody loves them unless they buy them for the most part totally useless items that are either withered or eaten within a week. No I don't have a girlfriend, but if I did, I wouldn't be getting upset if she didn't buy something for me on a random day in February... in fact I would be happier if she didn't, because then there would be less pressure on me to spend hours trying to find some 'perfect' gift for her.

Having said that, I used to hate V-day, but for some reason this year it really didint bother me. Where a couple of years ago, I would see a couple doing there thing, and think 'oh ffs get out of my face with that', this year it was more like 'aww they look so happy together'... anybody know what that means? I'm not used to not being bitter about the whole thing :smile:

I don't know, Jeff . . . I know my girl (:D) isn't like that. She sort of gets upset when I buy her stuff, mostly because I can't afford it. But, I know she likes it. But she doesn't demand it. I wouldn't ever let the communication between her and I get so low that she felt that I had to purchase love mementos to remind her that I care. I don't know, maybe it's really just the fact that I put the seat down shrugs

Anyway . . . look! HL2 Again . . . and . . . Doom 3 . . . in a double pack!

Runs and travels to the day of Lavos and saves your asses from spikey-explosive destruction

Valentines day doesn't bother me in the slightest - I think its more of an issue back in primary school than any other time, where the school deliver cards themselves around the classes, hoping you get one so you don't look like some unpopular guy. I always seemed to have a girl after me in primary school so it wasn't a problem, if only that were true these days!

I was also in a position of just going out with a girl for a couple of weeks before Valentines a couple of years back, its a bit of an awkward one. I was however abroad at the time snowboarding, so I ordered flowers to be delivered to her house on the day. She was happy enough although she would always jest that it was terrible of me to bugger off for Valentines day. What can I saw, the relationship didn't last :wink:

Yeah, because you were really going to waste ?800 or whatever the holiday cost just to spend a particular day with a girl you met a few weeks ago... lol.

wil5on said:

Jinx said:
so I left her a little container I got and filled with Hersey Kisses and a funny card... seemed to be just right, she really liked it, but it wasn't anything too much.

[rant]
Hershey? My god man! America really needs decent chocolate.
[/rant]

I agree, they aren't exactly the best chocolate, but it's the name that was important in this case since kissing is our favorite pasttime it seems

Bah, it's hard enough at my age to find a woman who can understand basic human compassion, let alone one whom I can actually trust.

As soon as I hit ninth grade and started putting a little gel in my hair, women were actually speaking to me, which was a real shocker ... but it took me a while to realize that wasn't at all anything sincere or deep, I just happened to be the guy who smelled/looked the best for that particular five second period.

But hell, it's still high school.

That's actualy been my problem for a very long time Cass. I have a terrible time finding women who are on the same emotional/intelectual plane as myself. Fortunatly it gets easier as you get older. certainly in highschool most girls are incredibly shalow. Even now, there are so many pretty faces on campus with absolutly nothing behind them.

/me thinks that is a major problem with women

Oh well, its fun for a while to not have to deal with any sort of difficult questions like "Do you love me?" or the all-too-popular quote "meet my parents."

Damn. meeting "the parents" can be the most awkward situation in the world

Tracer Bullet said:
Damn. meeting "the parents" can be the most awkward situation in the world

Or you can get some kind of perverse thrill out of it, like: "Nice to meet you Mrs. X. And yes, I'm banging your daughter. She's positively pneumatic. Oh, what a lovely garden you have!".

Gollum...that's probably the one reason you can't hold a steady relationship (or can you?)

I honestly think it would be better if it was Mr. X instead, in which case you would probably be beaten out of her parent's house.

How can you not like Hershey's chocolate? What mass-produced kind is better? I've had Ghiradelli and Toblerone, and those pale in comparison.

hmm

Ghiradelli doesn't hold a candle to Hersheys, and that's sad.

God Gollum! I have not laughed that hard in a while

-Horn I totaly agree, but when you meet a girl and there is obveously strong mutual attraction form the first moment you don't waste time waiting for the holidays to pass!

meeting the parents is usually a breeze.. cept if its one of those asian families.. that dont like their daughter seeing a white guy.. asian girls are hot though.. [/babble]

Cash Car Star said:
Just a little piece I wrote for another site, figured I'd post it here too

As you all know, today is Valentine?s Day?the cruelest of holidays. No other holiday separates the ?haves? and ?have-nots? like Valentine?s Day. Just think about it, an entire day solely devoted to celebrating your significant other. What if you don?t have anyone? No other holiday is like this. Halloween is about celebrating candy, if you don?t have any, you can just walk around ringing doorbells and you?ll get it for free. Yadda yadda yadda, post continues...

xEMOx

Skeletor - I have no clue what the hell you posted

He's calling you a straight-edge Emo crybaby. I suggest banning him. :razz:

Oi, I posted that cause I thought it was funny, not cause I needed to get anything off my chest. Except this damn Elvis Tattoo... Who thought those things were permanent?

What the hell is with the x's though? Man, them internetted middle schoolers keep coming up with new ways to murder our language.

Gollum...that's probably the one reason you can't hold a steady relationship (or can you?)

No, there are many more reasons that I can't hold a steady relationship :biggrin: A misplaced sense of honesty is just one of them.

Yak_Fighter said:
How can you not like Hershey's chocolate? What mass-produced kind is better?

Cadbury, for a start. Nestle is also pretty good. Dove is very nice, but a bit pricey.

Best chocolate product EVER = Tim Tams. And you Yanks dont have them!

Hershey's is horrible, tastes like free-trade/NPO budget chocolate :razz: Cadburys is the best

I like Ghirardelli chocolate... But then I'm a yuppy "square" so I guess it makes sense...

Leperous said:
Cadburys is the best

It's just as I expected...

Marabou!

Seems I've created a debate...

Actually, I've never heard of Ghirardelli. Is this an american attempt at "nice" chocolate?

Actually, I've never heard of Ghirardelli. Is this an american attempt at "nice" chocolate?

Well no, actually. Surprisingly enough, this company invested money and time with the goal of creating the worst chocolate in the world. Crazy folk, I tell ya.

It's an American chocolate company that is based in San Fransisco that I happen to enjoy.